Just pondering...........

Do you ever stop, take a look at your life and wonder, how did I get here? And not in a negative way but rather a curious one? Today, I did just that. Never did I picture myself 27, married to the best man ever, (seriously, when I married him, I don't even think I realized how perfect he is for me and how wonderful!) living in LAS VEGAS, a stay at home mom, one who is getting frustrated with the dynamics of adding to this family and someone who has changed so much over the years. My interests have changed as well as how I perceive myself. I used to live in the now and not worry so much about the future (sometimes I miss those days.) Now, all I seem to do is plan for the future and it gets exhausting. I wish I could just say forget it, I'll cross that bridge when I get there but my personality won't allow it and even though I wasn't the one who served a 2 year tour for the military, it changed who I am and my marriage. Was it for the worst? No, but who knows what things would have been like had that not occurred. Point is, it was meant to be and I wouldn't change it. However, I often wonder what things would be like had I not been so idle with my decisions. I could have accomplished more and I often wish I had. My life is good and I have always thought that. I am truly blessed but wow, things have changed over the years and when I was younger, I honestly didn't think much about the future. I think I thought I would be young and childless forever. The circle of life continues and sometimes I stop, look around and wonder how time went by so fast and how I am standing here now and it takes my breath away.